So You (Or Your Partner) Said Something Messed Up During Conflict
Now What?
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Pretty much everyone has said or done something in the heat of conflict they at least a little bit regretted later. You exaggerate the details to make a point. You bring up your partner's mom and how much they're like her (but like, not in a good way). You scoff or glare or go silent.
Humans are human. For the most part, a quick, "wait, that was out of line, let me try again" or "I froze, I'm here now" is more than enough to repair.
But what about when you go beyond ordinary "not great" territory? What do you do after you say something genuinely messed up during a fight? Or...what if your partner said something, and now it's in your brain and you can't get it out?
In a recent "ask me anything" on Instagram, I got this question more than any other. What do we do when stuff has been said during conflict that is, quite honestly, kind of unforgivable?
In this post I will walk you through:
- Exactly what kind of unacceptable comments we're talking about here
- Why people say unhinged stuff during conflict
- How to repair when you're the one who said something messed up
- What to do when your partner said something messed up
- Steps to take when you BOTH said god awful stuff and are collectively reeling
This one is a banger if I do say so myself, so let's get right into it.
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