How To Cope When Your Partner Can't Validate Your Emotions

Practical Ways To Show Yourself The Care You Need

Validation is a buzz word, that's often discussed in a very superficial way. For example, to validate you, your partner should say a specific script in response after you share emotions.

For example: "That sounds so hard. Of course you're feeling sad. You have every right to feel that way."

Most people won't mind hearing something like that, but validation is so much more. To me, validation is less about the specific words that someone says to you and more about their emotional stance toward you. No matter what words come out of their mouth, if your partner shows you with their non-verbal behavior and their energy that they accept what you're feeling, you'll feel validated.

And that is a damn good feeling.

But the reality is, your partner is not a validation dispenser. The emotional engagement behind validation is absolutely vital to relationships, but not in a 24/7 capacity. Sometimes you will want validation, and it just won’t be available from them.

In those moments, you don't have to feel lost at sea. You can still show yourself the compassion and validation that you're craving.

Today, I'm reviewing simple, practical ways you can validate yourself when your partner can't. Not because you don't deserve validation from them (you do) but because when they can't give it, your feelings still exist and need presence and care.

We'll discuss six tangible self-validation tactics and explore why self-validation is such a vital skillset, one that enhances your wellbeing as a human.